Mixed emotions...

I thought I would be THRILLED tonight...the oldest left home for the 2nd, no wait...3rd time...or is it the 4th? Heck I don't even KNOW anymore! Let's just say he's been gone and back several times in the past 5 years or so. He's not financially responsible and has moved back home to get his feet underneath him again. Is it final this time? I sure as HECK hope so...but why is there a knot in my gut?

Today he moved about 2 hours away from us...he "hated" it here and has a friend 2 hours away. SO...he moved in with his friend and his wife for a couple of months until their baby is born in late July. He found 2 jobs last week and starts on Thursday at one and on Monday at the other. He will put in about 55 hours/week between the 2. He needs to find an apartment but that's tough to do when one has an eviction and poor credit. He most likely will have to pre-pay his rent in order to find a place.

SO...why the knot in my gut? Because I am scared to death that he will need to move home once again. I'm not sure I could survive that. He's 24 1/2 years old and it's TIME that he become responsible AND independent! I'm just not sure that this child will EVER get there. *sigh*

SO...with this knot in my gut...and this child moving out...if you have extra prayers in you can you ask God to wrap his arms around Joe (a non-believer) and guide him to independence and personal success? Thanks...cuz I so want this knot in my gut to be gone.

I love you and miss you already Joe! (Gosh I didn't think I'd say that!)